Thanksgiving: The Long and Short of It

Something funny happened to me on the way to the half-century mark; Thanksgiving became my favorite holiday. Formerly relegated to third-class status behind Christmas and the 4th of July, it’s done an end-around and now occupies the top spot.

Logically, this makes sense, as you get more days off than the 4th, and with Christmas and New Year’s still to come, you don’t get that empty feeling when it’s over, knowing that the holidays are through.

So, in honor of my new favorite holiday, here are a few thoughts on the food, people, and traditions I’ve experienced over the years;

Long turkey. Short ham.

Long mashed potatoes. Short yams, candied or otherwise.

Long corn. Short peas.

Long real plates. Short paper plates.

Long h’dourves. Short Ritz crackers.

Long black olives from a can. Short green olives from a jar.

Long the “big” table. Short the kid’s table.

Long white meat. Short dark meat.

Long good craft beer. Short the variety pack from Big Lots.

Long crescent rolls in a can. Short artisanal bread.

Long cranberries. Short Jell-O with ruffies. (Note to self, don’t invite Cosby back).

Long pumpkin pie. Short apple pie. Double short mincemeat pie.

Long Cool Whip. Short Reddi-Whip.

Long leftovers. Short doing dishes.

Long first cousins. Short second cousins.

Long hot aunts (by marriage). Short creepy uncles.

Long menthol smoking great grandpas. Short tofurky eating second wives.

Long giving thanks. Short talking politics.

Long family. Short family.

Long the Twilight Zone marathon. Short the Simpsons marathon.

Long playing football in the street. Short watching football on the couch.

Long a touch of Christmas. Short the remnants of Halloween.

Long relaxing in your pajamas all day. Short the last-minute dash to the store to get more butter.

Long feeling young. Short thinking old.

Long those still here. Short those that passed.

Long making it another year. Short worrying about the next.

I hope you and your loved ones have a great Thanksgiving and I am thankful that you took a few minutes out of your day to read this.

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About Brian Lund

About Brian Lund

Great father. Good friend. Decent writer. Lacking husband. Solid drummer. Sometimes funny. Often A-hole. Terrible poker player. Too smart. Punk rock. Work in an ice cream shop.

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