1. Congress gets rid of those pesky pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters, and half-dollars and replaces them with the Ipod nano, the Ipod, the ITouch, the Ipad mini, and the Ipad.
2. The Pope begins the Canonization process for “Saint Stephan Jobian.”
3. Jim Cramer changes his signature phrase from ”BOOYAH….!!!” to “APPLESAUCE…!!!”
4. Public schools are required to teach a new type of science class based on the “reality distortion field” theory.
5. StockTwits changes its name to “AppleTwits.”
Brilliant stuff like this rains down like..well, rain, on my stream during the week. If you want to get wet, follow me on Twitter and StockTwits. You can also pick up my book Trading - The Best of the Best: Top Trading Tips For Our Times by clicking here.